Giiirrrlll, I am SO sorry I've been abusing the shit out of you lately. It's just...well, it's summer and you know what that means. Cocktails. Beer. BBQ. Late nights. Sun-filled days. It means good times. But it also means I need to reel it in a bit and stop treating you like a dumpster with the sunburns, hangovers, carbo-loading, and drunken slam dancing. I must pace myself. It's only June after all.
So, like, I'm going to try to treat you nice, okay? I promise to start eating more fruits and veggies (does Corona with lime count? No seriously, a lime is a fruit after all) and drinking more water. I'll try to exercise more (ahem, sex), run around outside (sunbathe), and do my squats. No shade there, I DO need to squat it up again 'cause it felt good and my tush looked much firmer and I didn't shudder every time my husband grabbed at it. Grab away, that shit was like stone. Lies. But it was definitely not as much of a giggly mess.
In return YOU need to stop giving me the plague every other week. It's lame and really inconvenient. Antibiotics blow ass and I'd rather not put anymore shit into my body than is necessary, such as alcohol and the occasional White Castle cheeseburger. Or McDouble, because fuck healthy.
Much Love and Respect,