Last year I vowed that I wouldn't make a single resolution. Instead, I was going to make one or even a few resolutions every month. Well, in typical Justine fashion that lasted a whole 3 days. I suck hard at keeping commitments. (Note to self, work on that.) I plan to try this again in 2016, and hopefully I will succeed, in not fully than at least slightly better than 2015.
So for January, I'm going old school. January will now be called January Jeans because I am determined to lose some of this excess lazy flab and fit into my older clothes, specifically a really cute pair of high-waisted skinny Abercrombie jeans. I love those fuckers and I used to look super cute in them. Plus, they went with EVERYTHING. When I put them on now, it's just...not right. Aside from the fact that they look like I've literally crammed myself in them (I have), they are severely uncomfortable. It just isn't working.
Here's the deal for mission January Jeans: Gym 3 days a week, cut sugar in half, no eating past 7:00 pm, and....dun, dun, dun...NO BOOZE! I have been abusing my body with alcohol and horrific food for a full year. Obviously I need a new hobby because this lifestyle just isn't conducive to my well being. Like, AT ALL.
Here's the problems I foresee happening with January Jeans: I am vacationing in Colorado for 3 nights without my chitlins and husband. So, what's the problem? I'm free to basically do whatever the fuck I want. But instead of lazing about and drinking my vacation away, I REALLY want to enjoy every single minute of it in the healthiest way possible. That might mean going to bed a little earlier or eating a yummy salad instead of deep fried insert any kind of food here, but whatever. I will also need to figure out some form of exercise while I'm there. And unfortunately lifting several pounds of McGriddles in my mouth doesn't count. Maybe I'll just use my new tiny niece as a weight and do some squats :)
If you know me, you know this will be a HUGE test of a month, especially for my first month of resolutions. I can imagine that I will be emotional and stressed as I will be withdrawing from all the toxins. I will be bitchy and maybe hate my life every once in a while, but I want to succeed. I want to start reaching goals that I set. I want to be proud of myself.
The jeans are out, hanging up for me to see, revving me up (or taunting me), and looking chic as shit. Hang on ladies, you will be hugging my body soon. And it WON'T be a bear hug, just a nice sweet comfortable cuddle :) Because if you try to bear hug me at the end of January, I may just set you on fire.