Parking Wars. Wait, Isn't That A Show?
I was dreading Evie's morning drop off and afternoon pickup at school. We live too close to the school for her to take the bus, and I stay home with Little E anyway, so I just made sense for me to be the shuttle for Eves. She was upset at first, of course, because she wanted to ride the big yellow bus, but came around to me driving her when she realized she could sleep in for 40 more minutes every morning. Sweet.
I dreaded the drop off and pickup because almost every mom I know that has done it said it was a nightmare. You sit FOREVER in a car line, wasting gas, trying to keep the other kids occupied in the back (if you have other kids) and when you finally drop off or pick up, you have to wait YET AGAIN for 10 years before you are out of the parking lot and on your way back home or to work.
The first half of the first week sucked. I didn't know where to go or what to do, so I just blindly followed the cars in front of me. I walked Eves to her class in the morning and in the afternoon I waited in the line to pick her up. I stressed the fuck out because Little E was in the backseat throwing a fit out of boredom and (probably) back sweat. She wasn't having any of it. The first 3 days really tested my patience. But then I discovered it was just way easier to park in the afternoon and walk in to get Eves. And it is. Except for the parking situation.
If I am running even 2 minutes behind schedule to get to school, I have to park 75 miles from the school. Parking in the afternoon is a complete shit show. There are two main parking lots that fill up quicker than my bladder after a few cocktails. After the lots are full, there is a field that parents can park in. To get into the field there is a huge muddy drop off from the actual road. Cars have started to create their own paths to the field instead of bottoming out, and because of all the rain we've been having the field is a TOTAL mess. I park there every afternoon and EVERY AFTERNOON I am appalled by how the other parents park. I mean, they are ALL OVER THE FUCKING PLACE. I've had someone park so close to my passenger side that Eves had to climb over all the shit in the car and get out of my side. Twice. Of course I was tempted to leave a note on the car, but with my luck the person would walk over just as I was putting it on their car and I would have to explain my insane rage to them, and that just won't do. It can't be explained and I hate confrontation. So instead I just stew. I take mental pictures of the parents that park like assholes and do a little mind voodoo. Not really, but I do give them the stink eye behind my sunglasses.
Today some of the cars hit a new low. It took me no less than 10 minutes to reverse my car out of the field. I had to do about 300 reverses, K turns, U-turns, you name it. Finally we were out of there and some turd cut me off. Come on! It was probably that dude that honked at me for 5 minutes straight a few weeks ago. I mentally clicked a photo of his license plate and gave a lengthy speech to Everly about the dangers of cutting people off. She babbled something in the backseat and I like to think she was agreeing with me. Most likely though she was telling me to shut the fuck up and keep my eyes on the road. Oh Evs, you're just like me, no patience for silly shenanigans. Here's hoping afternoon pickup goes a little smoother.
UPDATE: Pickup was worse. Wayyyyyy worse. It was raining buckets. Wrangling myself + two kids under a little umbrella is my new definition of hell.