A Snyder In The Sun

A Snyder In The Sun

We've Got A Biter!

I breastfed Evie for six months.  She was a good eater and I know I could have kept going with it.  The thing was,  I was 23 years old and really just wanted my body back.  I was tired of having a little person stuck to me all day and night.  I switched her to formula and that was it.  Sweet freedom.

Fast forward to Everly.  Man, I loved breast feeding her.  I think it may have been because I matured (shut it!) and stopped thinking about my body in such selfish terms.  She was a great eater.  In the beginning she was stuck to me 24/7.  Seriously, that baby just ate and ate and ate.  I managed to lose all of my pregnancy weight (and then some) in the course of four months after she was born.  High five Everly! Thanks kid!  

I felt such a sense of bonding while I fed her.  My boobs were her go-to comfort blankets whenever she was upset.  Pop her on the boob and life was good.  She slept on them, drooled on them, puked on them, and loved on them.  And then it happened.  Everly started teething.

During the teething process, my baby decided that my breasts (READ: nipples!) were teething toys.  At first it wasn't a big deal because she didn't have any ACTUAL teeth.  But by the time she was four months old, Everly had two teeth.  Ok, no big deal.  We will handle this.  She sort of bit a few times, more so when even more new teeth were coming in, but it didn't hurt.  It was more annoying than anything.

At nine months old she bit me.  Oh, she bit me good.  Totally made me bleed into my milk-stained nursing bra.  I was pissed.  But what could I do?  Yell at her?  Sure, she would absolutely understand why I was mad.  NOT!  She hadn't been introduced to formula yet, so that wasn't an option.  I had to put my big girl panties on (also referred to as preggo panties) and keep feeding Evs.  Apparently keeping your child alive is the first rule of parenting.  Who knew?

At Everly's nine month checkup,  the doctor said she had lost weight.  Not good.  She asked how my breasts felt at the end of the day.  Ummm, like deflated balloons?  That's normal right?  Not so much.  Turns out she was literally sucking me dry and STILL not getting enough to eat.  Doc said she needed formula to supplement, which was super frustrating for me because I had a goal in my mind to strictly boob feed for at least a year.  Oh well.  Whatever my baby needed, she was going to get.  I needed to fatten her up.

So we tried the formula and it chunked her up good.  I still breast fed a few times a day too.  By then she had even more teeth.  One day she latched on to one of my nipples and wouldn't let go.  I had a complete moment of panic thinking that she would just rip the thing off.  Seriously, she was on there for a good 10 seconds, clamped on like a Rottweiler.  That was it.  I was done. By the time Everly was ten months old, she was completely weened off my boobies.   

It was a good decision to stop breast feeding.  Everly is almost one years old and I see the way she eats.  She is crazy.  That baby will literally put ANYTHING into her mouth and chew the shit out of it.  Dirt?  Delicious.  Carpet fibers?  Yum.  Paper?  Nothing has ever tasted as good.  I can only imagine what she would be doing to my boobs.  I was sad I didn't make it to my 12 month goal, but you know what I learned through the whole second baby breast feeding adventure?  Fuck breast feeding if it means you won't have any nipples left by the time the kid is one.  Formula is perfectly fine.

Feel free to pass me around to your friends.  I like to be shared ;)