I Didn't Shave For A Month
This year was my first time purposely participating in No Shave November. I grew up in PA, so I'm pretty sure I unknowingly participated several times. Here in Florida though, it's a different story. It's still hot in November, like 80 degrees hot. If we're lucky, we'll get a cold front that comes through. And by cold front I mean 60 degrees. So, shorts and tank tops are still on the menu. This year I said fuck it. I'm lazy and the idea of not shaving for a month was almost too appealing.
The first week went smoothly. I've been known to skip a week of shaving. Actually, it's quite typical for me to skip a week. When that happens, you can find me wearing lots of capris and t-shirts. A little stubble never killed anyone.
Weeks two and three were a little more irritating. It was hot out and jeans started pissing me off. First of all, my muffin top was shooting up over the top of my jeans. Not cute. Second, it was hot as balls and I'm pretty sure the hair was making it that much hotter under the layer of denim that was stuck to my skin.
Week four was good. I was in PA for Thanksgiving and it snowed like a sonofabitch. At this point, the hair was out of control and layered so thick that I could have been in a bikini and stayed warm. The Yeti had nothing on me.
But still, the leg hair drove me crazy. It was patchy, grody, and overall it bothered me. And my lady region? Well, let's just say that 70's porn called, they wanted the beaver back. I'm not a stickler for a perfectly manicured puss, but I do like my nether region to look presentable in undies. A crazy bush growing out of control probably wasn't the most enticing thing to my husband either. Or maybe it was? I don't know. I never asked. He certainly didn't vocalize any complaints. Hashtagmarriedhairysexisstillfun.
Finally, the armpit hair. Something happened, guys. Something strange. I grew a fondness towards my growing pit hair. I don't know why. Maybe because it wasn't as patchy as my leg hair? It didn't look as crazy as the pubic hair? I have no idea. What I do know is that when I finally shaved on December 2nd, I kept the armpit hair. I'm still rocking it now. I've contemplated shaving it in every shower I take, and I just can't bring myself to do it yet. Trust me, I am as confused as you are. I told my husband I finally shaved.
Hey, so I finally shaved.
Yeah, everything but my armpits. I'm keeping the hair.
It's not like I'm super proud of the hair. In fact, I'm slightly self conscious to lift my arms up. Picture a T-Rex trying to do the YMCA. That's me. I just won't allow myself to go balls-to-the- walls in the arm lifting department yet. But I'm working on it. Slowly. We'll see, maybe I will shave it tomorrow, maybe I will keep it forever. Decisions decisions...